Advent: A Reminder to Wake Up

Dear Child of Mine, 

After years of following Jesus, I am just now beginning to embrace the seasons of the Christian year, experiencing the life changing lessons contained in the liturgy and the communion of saints. Advent is such beautiful, yet challenging time in life of the Church. It is at this time of year that we are reminded of our need to wake up to the coming of Jesus in our lives.

Along with my dear vespers sisters,* I am using Ruth Haley Barton's Advent Reflections to guide my focus during this season of faith. Her writing and urging, combined with the lectionary Scripture passages have offered the opportunity for self-examination, for refocusing, for shifting my perspective.

We wait in eager expectation of Jesus' birth, his first coming.
Our spirits certainly anticipate, with every-increasing desire, his second coming in glory.
But we ought also to look for the coming of Christ into our daily lives, today.  

The difficulty is in this time of liminal space (as described by Richard Rohr) in which we are no longer experiencing that which we are comfortable and oh so familiar; yet neither have we seen the resolution of the waiting, the answer, the direction, the everything-is-turning-out-fine moment. We are in the time of holding our breath, left to wait. We can choose to gasp for air, fight for our lives, flee the fearful expectancy. Or we can seek the Lord Jesus Christ in this uncertainty, looking for his movement, listening to his voice. Because even in the waiting, especially in the waiting, there is Jesus.

Dear One, I am waiting with an ever-increasing desire for your arrival. But this morning I prayed this prayer of confession -

Lord Jesus, As hard as this is to admit, I thank you for this long time of advent in my life. This journey of infertility may continue for many more years, I don't know, but the grace, the blessing has come and is coming in the ways I'm learning to seek you. I imagine where my focus would be right now if I had gotten "my way" and it's not likely to be totally on you. Teach me now how to keep company with Jesus, how to kindle communion with Him, that it may be an inextricable part of me in years to come.

I look forward to celebrating Advent with you in the years to come, teaching you about the birth of Jesus, the anxiety of Mary and Joseph, the obedience of the wise men and shepherds. I will walk you through the weeks leading up to the day we celebrate his incarnation, teaching you about the discipline of waiting and leading you to look for Jesus especially in those times when we hold our breath. In my hopeful waiting for you to become a part of my life, I pray I will become more and more connected to Jesus. I desire you deeply, but I want my Christ-seeking to always be at the forefront of pursuits. And I want you to know that about me.

Seeking Him first,

Your Mama


*I join with a small group of women on Wednesday evenings to pray the evening prayer along with our own needs and reflections. One hour of prayer with kindred spirits. 

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The One with the Still Mornings

so pleased to be joining up with Gypsy Mama's Five Minute Friday challenge. The starting concept is-

Awake

These past two weeks have been beautiful. Awaking early in the morning, before the sun rises, all because I have an 8am "devos" date with my husband. 

I have always been a morning person. I enjoy the thrill of early morning runs, watching the sun peek over the horizon, knowing so much of the town still sleeps. Those few days over the Christmas holiday were especially peaceful. Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse - surprisingly accurate depiction of small town America on the mornings of Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Not one car passed me. No one was out to get the newspaper. No garage doors creaking open to reveal cars packed and ready for the work day. Here or there a light shone in a window, a chimney released its warm smoke, but mostly all was still. 

I feel peace in the mornings, as hard as it is to pull back the warm covers and peel open my sleepy eyes. It is quiet. A new day, ready to be written. Will I follow obediently in the path God has laid out for me, holding his hand and following his lead? Or will I try to maintain control and guide my steps on my own? 

The One Who is Frail

Perfect words from Jesus in the precise moment that my soul needed them. 

Grow strong in your weakness. Some of my children I've gifted with abundant strength and stamina. Others, like you, have received the humble gift of frailty. Your fragility is not a punishment, nor does it indicate lack of faith. On the contrary, weak ones like you must life by faith, depending on Me to get you through the day. I am developing your ability to trust me, to lean on Me, rather than your own understanding. Your natural preference is to plan out your day, knowing what will happen when. My preference is for you to depend on me continually, trusting Me to guide you and strengthen you as needed. This is how you grow strong in your weakness.  

I don't have to understand how so-and-so does it all. God enables them, for His greater purpose. I shouldn't believe something's wrong with me when I feel weak or tired. Receiving this message from God was such an amazing blessing. I have limits because He created me that way. I shouldn't reject them, trying to be more, do more.

Come to me, He says, all who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. 

I must simply run to Him. Seek strength in Him. Depend on the One who created me with this fragility. And be thankful.

For all is grace.

---

Jesus Calling pg 254, by Sarah Young.  

The One on the Foresight of Jesus

Today I have the honor of guest posting over at one of my favorite blog communities--(in)courage. Won't you visit me there?

----

As I opened my favorite devotional (Jesus Calling by Sarah Young), I read these words that went straight to my heart:

"Be willing to follow wherever I lead. Follow Me wholeheartedly, with glad anticipation quickening your pace. Though you don't know what lies ahead, I know; and that is enough! Some of My richest blessings are just around the bend: out of sight, but nonetheless very real. To receive these gifts, you must walk by faith--not by sight. This doesn't mean closing your eyes to what is all around you. It means subordinating the visible world to the invisible Shepherd of your soul."

Oh, Jesus, how perfect those words fit the needs of my spirit today.

....read the rest of this post over at (in)courage.

-----

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The One with Girls Questioning God's Creation

God is not done moving among us. 

Satan, of course, has had his turn at attempting to tear down the stronghold Jesus has on the hearts of our youth group.

The Enemy has done his best to conjure up conflict and create strife and put a wedge in between all the good that is happening. 

But I see what you're pulling, Satan, and I raise you eleventy billion. 

Because God's on our side. 

So there!

I'm all too quickly becoming an expert in conflict management, 

forgiveness, 

and the methods of Matthew 18. 

But I won't give up.

Even though my efforts seem for naught, I refuse to throw in the towel. 

Last night at youth group, Kevin and I led two separate (unrehearsed) discussions on forgiveness and on living a life far from lukewarm. 

As the girls shared the areas in their life where they are lukewarm--where they have given God enough, but not all--my heart was being moved towards a specific topic. 

I didn't plan it. 

In fact, I've all but stopped planning--God's will is so much more evident when I don't try to force my outline into His agenda.

With 12 girls listening intently, I began to broach the taboo topic. 

Girls and body image. 

I wanted them to see they are not alone--

that every girl has something she dislikes or even despises about her body. 

There were nodding heads and open hearts. 

I told them of my own struggles. 

And I shared with them the message only God could place in my mouth--

what right does the created have to question to the wisdom of the Creator?

I gave them this example from my marriage:

For a while, I constantly held a very negative opinion of my figure. 

Kevin would always tell me of my beauty, but I still complained--

basically choosing to call him a liar by refuting his statements. 

He finally stopped me in my tracks.

My loving husband told me that when I talk badly about myself, it hurts him.

It tells him I don't trust him enough to believe that his words are true. 

This is just one example of how Kevin exemplifies Christ to me. 

Jesus is saddened when we compare ourselves to others, when we talk badly about the body we've been given, when we mistreat our body, when we believe the lies from Satan. 

We are wrong, women.

We are not just living stunted lives because of our inability to see ourselves as the crown of creation, 

but we are living selfishly. 

We are not considering the effects our low opinions of ourselves have on our husbands, our friends, our God.

Listen to the words Jesus is speaking. 

Believe Him. 

Embrace the Truth. 

And you will be set free indeed.   

(in case you don't click on that link above:

You'll want to check out my post on Beauty over at our devotional blog--We Chase the Son.)

The One with a Brief Hiatus

I know I've been a bit lacking in the blog posting department lately. 

Sorry. 

It's not you.

It's me. 

I can't wait to get back to regularly scheduled programming. 

But for now, you're going to have to put me on pause again. 

Or I'm putting me on pause. 

I don't know. I've used so many cliche comments I'm confused. 

All those words to say Kevin and I are going to be taking a much needed ministry/personal/spiritual retreat. 

We'll be back home Thursday.

Both of us are looking forward to unplugging. 

Rebooting. 

Recharging. 

And having all systems running full force just in time for the school year to begin. 

Pray for us while we're gone. 

And in the mean time, you might revisit some past favorites. 

My first post. 

Because it's random and adorable. 

Two years later and this is still totally true.

Totally entertaining, engraved in my memory, and seemingly a reader favorite.  

The One with the Fragility

Remember when I mentioned this:

"It's okay to say 'no.' In fact, it's even healthy. I don't have to do everything in order to know I'm loved, appreciated, or valued. And it's okay to admit when I'm tired and weary and need a break. Who knew I just couldn't do it all?"

It was just last evening, so the thought was on the forefront of my mind. 

This morning, while reading my daily dose of Jesus Calling, I glanced ahead at tomorrow's message. 

(How rebellious of me!)

It was perfectly suited for my thoughts on admitting my shortcomings, my needs. 

Jesus says, 

"Come to Me when you are weak and weary. Rest snugly in My everlasting arms. I do not despise your weakness, My child. Actually, it draws Me closer to you, because weakness stirs up My compassion--My yearning to help. Accept yourself in your weariness, knowing that I understand how difficult your journey has been.

Do not compare yourself with others, who seem to skip along their life-paths with ease. Their journeys have been different from yours, and I have gifted them with abundant energy. I have gifted you with fragility, providing opportunities for your spirit to blossom in My Presence. Accept this gift as a sacred treasure:  delicate, yet glowing with brilliant Light. Rather than struggling to disguise or deny your weakness, allow Me to bless you richly through it."  

It's so easy to believe I am sub-par when I compare myself with those around me.

"Well if they can do this and that and the other thing, then darn it I should be able to do the same--

and even better!"

Or "Compared to them, it doesn't seem like I'm at the right point for this stage of my life. 

I should be further along, better off, more prepared, etc etc etc."

I'm sure no one else struggles with fighting off those voices from the Enemy--

the ones trying to convince us that we are to govern our lives and keep up with the Joneses along the way. 

NO. 

We are not to be in control of our days. 

We are to relinquish control. 

To draw near to God. 

It doesn't take much effort. 

In fact "it is more like ceasing to resist the magnetic pull of [Jesus'] Love."

And that includes being fully confident that His plan for me and my family are uniquely ours--

perfectly suited, perfectly timed--

for HIS glory. 

The One that's Slow to Speak

I love it when I make people laugh. 

And when they're laughing at what I intentionally said or did. 

Not just because I did something totally lame and ridiculous and "Melanie-esque" which evoked the laughter. 

That just upsets me. 

But that's another story entirely.

This story is about my love of quick wit.

No, I'm not typically classified as the class clown. 

I'm not always the main event. 

Most people who know me probably wouldn't peg me as such. 

I do, however, enjoy my (occasionally impressive) quick wit. 

When I can come up with a snappy comeback in a split second and the crowd reacts, I feel pretty darn good about myself. 

But after my devotional reading the other day, 

I suddenly realized what that quick wit implied. 

I am boldly ignoring the commandment given in James 1:9.

Everyone should be quick to listen, 

slow to speak, 

and slow to become angry. 

ouch.

I'm not that professional at any of those things. 

Quick wit is valued in our culture. 

And I don't think there's anything wrong with humor.

In fact, I think God thoroughly enjoys our laughter and our senses of humor. 

But...

I know there have been plenty of times that I've responded in haste (in order to be funny) and immediately regretted the words that had left my mouth. 

But alas, once spoken, words cannot be taken back. 

Sure, I can apologize, but if I would act out the James command of thinking first I would save the listener some heartache and myself some extreme shame and embarrassment. 

Jesus really does know what is best for us. 

He's looking out for our hearts. 

And by doing so we will glorify Him, in all we do and say--

including the humor! 

The One that's Out of Control

Have you read Crazy Love?

The book Francis Chan wrote to beat us over the heads with the fact that we should be overwhelmed by a relentless GOD. 

I read for the first time around Christmas and thought it was excellent. 

Now, months later, our church is gearing up to start a small group study centered around Crazy Love. 

I'm really excited about the possibilities of the changes God could do in the hearts of our people through this book. 

Kevin and I are going to be leading a young adults group, 

and possibly taking our teens through it as well. 

To prepare, I've decided to read the book over again. 

Luckily this is the type of book that needs to be read. 

Repeatedly. 

As I got to the second chapter, the concepts starting hitting home. 

A little too close to home. 

Know what I mean?

"Justified Stress" was the title of the section. 

Oh, great. 

Just what I need to hear. 

How terrible it is to be stressed and 99 ways to combat it. 

Turns out, Chan's words were exactly what I needed to hear.

Sure, it was a little (or rather large) kick in the pants. 

But it was necessary. 

I've been so overwhelmed lately. 

So stressed. 

Feeling so out of control.

Worry worry worry. 

Chan's definitions of worry and stress are shockingly accurate. 

Worry implies that we don't quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough, or loving enough to take care of what's happening in our lives. 

Stress says taht the things we are involved in are important enough to merit our impatience, our lack of grace toward others (who, me?!), or our tight grip of control.

I have known that worry is a sin. 

In fact, it has always been my biggest area of sin. 

"Do not worry about life"--yeah right. 

That was one command I didn't foresee myself being able to obey. 

But what I hadn't considered before was the devastating, embarrassing truth that worry isn't the only sin I'm committing. 

I am being totally and completely selfish. 

As if, by some twist in the rules, I have "the right to disobey God because of the magnitude of my responsibilities." 

And not just that, but worry is an outright proclamation that I have forgotten about God. 

Yes. 

You read that right.

Forgotten about GOD.

Who do think I am? 

Thinking "it's okay to sin and not trust God because the stuff (it's just stuff) in my life is somehow exceptional. 

Both worry and stress reek of arrogance. 

They declare our tendency to forget that we've been forgiven, that our lives here are brief, that we are headed to a place where we won't be lonely, afraid, or hurt ever again, and that in the context of God's strength, our problems are small, indeed."(p42)

So, Mel, why don't you just get over yourself and step aside. 

Allow God his rightful place in your life. 

In control. 

Yes, Melanie, that's right. 

You don't need to be in control.

*shiver*

It will be okay.

In fact, life will probably be even better than your wildest dreams if you stop trying to make your own measly plans succeed. 

God wants to use you to bring him glory.

And that can only be done under His direction--

thus ensuring, the outcome will be magnificent. 

Mel, the point of your life is bring Him glory--

whatever it is you are doing. 

Making dinner for your husband, 

texting your awesome teenagers, 

cleaning bathrooms, 

teaching piano, 

or even reading a book. 

"The point of your life is to point to Him."

So, in case you forgot the whole point--

get over yourself.

Realize that, standing before the throne of God, the only thing that will matter is who I am in Christ and how I lived for Him--

hopefully, with reckless abandon to fulfill every ounce of His will for my life no matter how unknown or how worrisome the path.

The One where She Speaks Her Mind

I didn’t realize it until now, but apparently I resolved to live out loud.

As in, saying what I think. 

No. 

Don’t get the wrong idea. 

I’m not experimenting with rude remarks or hurtful comments. 

Although, I would have to admit those negative words may find their way from my thoughts to my lips. 

And I’m none to proud of those moments. 

What I am doing is being intentional about sharing the positive thoughts or thankfulness I feel toward an individual. 

It occurred to me that if I love hearing words of encouragement

(boy, do I ever!), 

then I’m assuming most people would be fed by such praise. 

So whenever I think, “I love that top she’s wearing” 

or “I really appreciated that helping hand” 

or “That meal was amazing”

or “I enjoyed the conversation we shared,”

I’m trying to share those thankful thoughts with the individuals who made me feel that way to begin with. 

It’s made me more aware of the abundant blessings in my life—

and they are many! 

Life is but a mist that appears for a little while and vanishes.

So why shouldn't we fill one another’s souls with encouragement?

Encourage one another and build each other up.