February 14, 2011

The One with Our Love Story. [part 1]

I didn't date. 

When I entered high school I knew I was joining the masses in their hormone-infused lifestyles. I had seen all the movies, watched all the shows. I knew what dating was all about, and frankly, I thought it was ridiculous.* Even as a 14 year old, I knew I didn't want to date. To me, the point of dating was to find the man you're going to marry, and there was no way in heck I was going to get married in high school (or even shortly thereafter). Rather than put myself through the emotional wringer of high school dating, I opted out. I made my own decision. I went against the flow. I was not going to date in high school.

*(Note: please don't take my personal opinions as offensive. I am talking about my life and my situation alone. I don't think dating is inherently wrong. I am just thankful for my naive perspective that saved me from pain.)

The plan went off without (much of) a hitch. Sure, there were times I wanted a boy to like me, to show interest in me, to ask me out. After all, I was still a teenaged girl. I didn't receive many opportunities to turn a guy down (not that I was looking to disappoint a boy). I'm pretty sure most guys knew me and my pure reputation, and they figured "Why bother?" I was totally ok with that. Once or twice my "I don't date in high school" mantra came in quite handy, and once or twice I felt a twinge of "I wish I could change my mind, just for a minute." But I came out the other end, heartbreak free, and I consider myself very blessed.  

Then, on Labor Day 2004, I moved into Gamma 213 on the campus of Spring Arbor University. Suddenly, it hit me. I was no longer IN high school. I had no defense! What would I do? What would I say? How would I keep from getting hurt? Would I find The One? Was he walking by me right this very minute? ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

*deep breath*

I put the thought aside and figured I'd just go with the flow. (Yeah, right, Mel, who were you kidding? Go with the flow???) It worked. For about a week. 

I found myself being hotly pursued by two guys--one a freshman, who intrigued me with his "godliness"--and one was a junior, who intrigued me with his "junior-ness." I was flustered and honored and totally confused. I had every girl on my floor listen to a voice message by Mr. Junior and give me advice. I had no clue what to do. But then, my roommate asked me a very good question: "Melanie, you have to decide if what you're feeling is attention or attraction." Hmmm. 

A few days later, I recognized that I was just giddy because of the attention I was receiving, not at all because I was attracted either of them. (Though the ice cream did help, Mr. Junior.)

At the end of that first month on campus, I was getting packed for a choir retreat. I was stressed trying to finished ALL of my homework by 4pm*, pack, eat dinner, and meet the bus in time. Out of nowhere I received a phone call. It was this guy from my Core Group.

*yes, this was a crazy deadline I had placed on myself.

to be continued

Read Part 2 HERE.


  1. I do believe Mr. Juniour gave you flowers too....?

  2. yes. I wasn't trying to get in all the details of those boys...just the basic idea.

  3. Oh dear Mel....you leave us all hanging like a suspense filled novel. ha-ha. Of course, a lot of us know how the story ends:)

    I think that there actually were quite a few young men who tried to pursue you in high school. You attended all your school dances with different young men who would have liked to move the relationship further, but you treated them and all other classmates in the kind and gentle way that God wanted you to. I believe that is why at your senior dinner and rewards were being announced, that your name was called repeatedly. Daddy and I sat with tears in our eyes when we realized what an impact you had during your high school yrs, as your classmates had voted for you as the most beautiful person inside and out. This was just one of many that night. I do believe that they saw Jesus in you and your actions. We love you. Sorry so long, but you know me:) mom

  4. I'm rooting for the "Core Kid"! (I assume he was a local)

  5. I love your blog! I am glad you had a great Valentines day...I have gave you the Stylish blogger award over at my blog...blessings!!!


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