The One with Surrendered Dreams

January 1st, 2011 is so vivid in my mind. The transformation God was working in my heart. Contentment.

I didn't even need to look back into all those months blog archives to be transported to that time alone with Jesus on the couch. But, reading my own sentiments all over again stir up in my heart a renewed pursuit of true contentment. {please read it again with me.}

This year I have learned much and grown deeply. But there is still so far to go. 

I have clung to Christ in new ways. But each day brings a choice. 

I have repeatedly meditated on the words of the worship chorus Surrender (by Marc James; Vineyard.)

I'm giving You my heart, all that is within 

I lay it all down, for the sake of You my King 

I'm giving You my dreams, laying down my rights 

I'm giving up my pride, for the promise of new life

And I surrender all to You, all to You 

And I surrender all to You, all to You

I'm singing You this song, I'm waiting at the cross 

All the world holds dear, I count it all as loss

For the sake of knowing You, for the glory of Your name 

To know the lasting joy, even sharing in Your pain

And I surrender it all to you, all to You

To surrender not just today or my present struggles. I've found it's actually easier to give up my struggles and sins and give over my heart to Jesus in a moment of emotion, than it is to truly say, "God, I'm giving you my dreams." Those wishes, hopes, aspirations have somehow seemed off limits to surrender. But every single time I hear that song, I am convicted of the necessity to give over my future to Jesus. Why not? He deserves all my trust. He holds the world. He knows my heart. He will cherish my dreams, yet bring me step by step through the life He knows is best for me. 

And so my 2012 will start with the same purpose as 2011. Contentment each day, found totally in Jesus. And surrendering my dreams to Him.

Have you made any commitments in this new year?