I am an open book, heart-on-my-sleeve type of gal. I love being honest and transparent with people. To me, meaningful relationships are everything. I'm not a fan of putting on a happy face, grinning and bearing it, or saying "Fine" in response to "How are you?" It's not real.
And I'm real.
But the difficult truth of my life--the life my husband and I have chosen to live--is one that requires prudence. Being in full time, under-the-microscope ministry means that our lives affect more than the two of us, more than our closest friends and family. Everything we say, everything we do, and even the things we don't say or do are under scrutiny. I would love to share everything in my life with everyone I come in contact with, but the reality is, I can't, I shouldn't. I can still strive be my truest self--full of love and joy and peace towards others.
The reason I am an open person is because I value the connection made with another when I lay my laundry--clean or dirty--in front of them, and they still love me. Many times, my situation can be easily related to by that other person. Sharing my circumstances may give the opportunity to minister to someone in a way I couldn't have otherwise. It's the thing I love about blogging--knowing I'm not alone, not the only one who's ever dealt with this or felt like that.
Being a leader in the church is an awesome privilege, a high calling, and a deep responsibility. It's important for us to be accountable for our actions, for the states of our hearts. But we must chose our mentors and confidants wisely.
It's hard to keep my lips locked at times. My natural tendency is share everything with everyone. But Scripture states we should keep a tight rein on our tongues and think before we speak. If anything, this life's work is teaching me that lesson very thoroughly.
Do those of you in ministry understand?
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